C'mere and I'll Tell You a Secret

That geeky looking guy on the Verizon network commericals? I totally have a crush on him.

The Cheese Stands Alone

Dear Internet,

I am in love with you, I am...but there's someone else right now. I am having an affair with Farm Town on Facebook. I know, I know what you are thinking, and you're wrong I tell you, wrong! I'll get bored of the mindless click-click of plowing and planting and harvesting. One day, I'll be back.

Love,
brokemom (who is really a broke mom with mounting pressure to shit-or-get-off-the-pot in a vicious circle of catch-22 fuckmylife situations while she ignores it by scwelching it with farmtown flava' and talking about herself in the third person)

P.S. FarmTown gives better head than you.

Last Day of School

J1 just graduated sixth grade. (With a straight 'C' average even! I blame the cell phone which has been confiscated for the summer!) I asked her about how her day had been.


She replied, "We were supposed to have 'Fun In the Sun' Day. Instead, we had 'Do Whatever You Want Because We Don't Care' Day."

Sounds like another great year is over and done with!