If Wishes Were Horses Then I'd Have a Stable

I wish...
I wish...
I wish I believed in a Higher Power.
I wish that I was okay with double standards.
I wish that I were a stronger person. Stubborn does not equal strong.
I wish my ex-husband would pay child support. My life would be easier.
I wish that I could be a doormat. But not really. If I give up my standards, then who am I, really? Just a girl without standards. No morals.
And those make me who I am.
I refuse to give in on things that I believe in. What kind of person would ask me to do something like that, anyway?
One who has lost the meaning of me.

And that, perhaps, is the saddest thing of all.