Monday, September 25, 2006

There's No Crying At The Eye Doctor

I got my first pair of glasses when I was nine years old.
I got my first pair of contacts at thirteen. When I put them in at the eye doctor's office, I cried. To be able to see clearly, without hardware on my face, was an emotional thing for me.
I switched back to glasses when I was eighteen. I was a new mother, the contacts were uncomfortable, and too much fuss.
Today, at twenty-seven years of age, I put in a pair of contacts. I didn't cry. I covered my eyes and peeked through my fingers...something I cannot do with glasses. I walked to the mirror, and looked at my face.
For the first time in almost ten years, I could see my face clearly without glasses on. It's how my fiance sees me in the morning. It's how my daughters see me in the middle of the night if they need me. But it's not how I see me.
I came home to put on some eyemakeup. I grabbed my eyeliner pencil and reached up to take my glasses off. I proceeded in almost poking myself in the eye, being so used to taking those glasses off.
Those of you with perfect eyesight take it for granted. You don't know how it feels to wake up in the morning and open your eyes, rub the sleep from them, and everything is still fuzzy. To have to squint and fumble for the right bottle of shampoo in the shower. To have to stand two inches away from the mirror in the morning to put on makeup.
Here I am with my contacts in. You've seen me before without my glasses, but now, I'm smiling because I can see you, too.


I am now going to the Mall, where I will try on pair after pair of sunglasses. Why? Because I never have.

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