Saturday, October 13, 2007

Something Nice

After reading a comment posted from my last entry, I got to thinking...I never do post anything nice about work. I never talk about the good stuff that happens, or the parts of my job that I actually enjoy. So, here goes:

1. I like sitting at a desk in an air/heat controlled room.

2. I like asking nosy questions.

3. I like weekends off, and working a set 8 hours a day.

4. My typing skills have improved considerably since I started working there.

5. I enjoy how many different types of people I meet. I meet old people, young people, ones with families and ones without. I see people who have lost, and people who have found. I am an observer of different events in people's lives, be it deaths or births, new jobs or new opportunities. Everybody has a different story, no two are the same. I have learned tolerance and to be patient.

There are more reasons, but I'm not going to list them yet. I'll save those for when I'm haivng a bad day, just to take a little look on the brighter side of things.

Monday, October 08, 2007

The Stupidest Conversation I Had Today

Scenario: Welfare Worker (me) at desk answering phone and talking to Clients

Ring! Ring!
WW: "Government Land, this is Welfare Worker!"
Client: "Hi, this is WhinyMom. How come my cash isn't what it was last time?"
WW: "Well, rules change over time, as do budgeting methods blah blah just because."
Client: "Yeah, but how come it's not what it was last time?"
WW: "Income was used in your case, and that amount is averaged over blabble blabble and so you got eleventyten dollars."
Client: "But how come it isn't how much it was last time?"
WW: "You.have.income. You.have.a.job. The whole point of welfare is to get.a.job. so your cash aid goes down, and then you are what we call being self-sufficient. You've done what you're supposed to do!"
*click* WhinyMom hung up on me.

What Your Food Stamps Won't Buy You

Your food stamps will not buy you a Vanilla Bean whatever with whip at Starbucks. You can try, but your card will not work. You can slide your card again, but it won't work the second time either.

They will not buy you a hot sandwich at the deli. If you order a hot sandwich, and then are told you cannot use food stamps to pay for it, you either pay for the sandwich or you have to forfeit the sandwich. The cashier will not ring it up as a cold sandwich "so's you can use them stamps".

Can't buy beer. Or cigarettes. Asking the guy in front of you in line if you can pay for his stuff if he'll "buy you some cigs in trade" is called welfare fraud. If I knew your name I would report you.

Take-n-bake pizza? Sure thing. As long as you take it and bake it. At home. If you have them bake it for you, you forfeit the pizza. Take it...and bake it.

Food stamps are for food items, people. Food. Not diapers. Not aluminum foil. Not birthday candles! Yes, I know they're to put in the cake, but a candle is not a food item!

Following these simple rules, guidelines even, will save us all some time in the checkout line.

Friday, October 05, 2007

Happy Colombus Didn't Discover America Day

Columbus Day is here again! Good! Great! Let's celebrate a day about a man who sailed around in a big boat and found a new land for the people!

What. the. fuck.

Let's celebrate a day for a man who sailed around until he "discovered" a land where people were already living.
Then he pretty much stole their land, took all their shit, and gave them new diseases which almost wiped out an entire population.
Super. Happy fucking Columbus Day.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Five Things We Learned At Work Today

1. Joel and I are both anti-banana.

2. If I wear my flat brown shoes I will shock the bejeesus out of myself on the copy machine. Every time.

3. Crying will get you what you want. No, not really! Tricked you! You can try though, whatever.

4. Watering the plant after it is dead will not help. Giving it away to a coworker, however, will magically bring it back to life...if you can explain to coworker why you are gifting them with a dead plant, that is.

5. Talk sweetly to the IT man and he will crawl under your desk to plug back in your moniter. Talk snippy to him and he will...well, I think he still has to do it, but maybe not as fast.